8 awesomely cringe-worthy bachelor party stories on Reddit
Reddit users. A fun bunch they are, and they don’t mind sharing a hilarious story or two as well. We’ve pulled 8 awesomely cringe-worthy bachelor party stories on Reddit. Check them all out on Reddit here.
#8 Popcorn wheel barrow
A friend of mine was a tourist in Finland, Walking around downtown helsinki when along comes a groom sitting buck naked in a wheelbarrow full of popcorn, being pushed down the street by the groomsmen. The groom had to give anyone that asked a bag of popcorn from the wheelbarrow, slowly exposing himself. I’ve wondered if this is normal Finnish behavior.
#7 Where men are men
My roommate got married in college and his fiance then told us if we were to have a bachelor party, it would be OK, but no strippers. And the best man comes up with the idea for a male stripper, but to be on the safe side and not wanting to get the groom in trouble, we ask her about it first. She is OK with it. AWESOME!
So, we get the groom drunk at our apartment. Tie him up to a chair and blindfold him. We let the stripper know this is a joke and oddly enough, he has done this before. So he starts grinding on the groom.
We unblindfold him and he flips shit. Falls over while in the chair and the stripper starts humping his face on the ground.
We call him off, tip the stripper, and have a few more drinks. The stripper apologizes to the groom and sticks around with us since we have him for a bit longer. He was really nice.
#6 Don’t look into her eyes!
When I was 18 my 24 year old brother was getting married, and I was a groomsman. The entire wedding party still lived near our mom’s house, so his best man decided to have the bachelor party in her living room because, in his eyes, it was both convenient and hilarious. Mom is totally cool with it and decides to hide out in her bedroom all night watching tv.
The stripper shows up and does her show. At one point she asks who wants to get spanked. My brother’s friends, who I’ve known since I was a kid, instantly volunteer me. I’m on all fours and this stripper is smacking my ass with a riding crop and I look up to see my mother in the hallway.
We lock eyes briefly. An entirely new level of embarrassment washes over me. She looks like she’s trying not to laugh too loudly and goes in to the bathroom. This was in 2005, and we never spoke of it again.
#5 Just some friendly business advice
At a bachelor party in Montreal, my buddy bought me a lap dance. As the girl was leading me to the upstairs room, she ran into a stripper friend starting her shift. Apparently, this was the first time seeing her since she had her boobs done. Small talk about their boobs commence (how big they got, which doctor they used, pain they are experiencing, are they going to go bigger), with them groping one another. My stripper eventually turns to me, and says “don’t her boobs look great? Go ahead, touch.”
She puts my hands on her friends boobs, then she tells me to compare them to her own. I’m standing their, squeezing two different strippers boobs like I’m comparing peaches at the organic grocer. It was a great time, fun was had by all.
In the back room, I also got about $100 of free dances for my expansive business knowledge as a result of my MBA to help her get her hair salon business off the ground. I don’t have an MBA… But she didn’t know that 😉
#4 Wait, do I know you?
Went to a friends party, local cop buddy hired a stripper. Long story short, got a lap dance from my ex girlfriends mom…didn’t realize it was her til later because she was so out of context and I had never seen her naked with all her stripper make up glory…
#3 You wanna go?!?!?
My friend, the bachelor, not normally violent decided he needed to go talked to the guy who keeps staring at him in the strip club. A few of us held him off while he was yelling “what are you looking at, do you want to go?” Our backs were to the mirror – we finally convinced him to let it go and get back to having fun. Yes, our esteemed friend was yelling at his own reflection.
Also a coworker’s wife was dancing that night as well.
#2 Never ask for proof
My friend was at a particularly dirty strip club for one. But the one guy there was not really into it. He was standing on the sidelines avoiding the girls when one comes up to him asking him why he isn’t getting any dances. He responds that he just isn’t interested. She says, “But I am so wet for you.” He says, “Prove it.” So she reaches down and touches herself and flicks the proof in this guys face. It proved her point because he needed to go to the bathroom to wash his face off. That night ended without further craziness, but a few weeks later this guy has a really bad itching in his eye. Goes to the Doctor. Yep. Eye Herpes.
#1 What happens on tour, stays on tour
Nothing happens at bachelor parties. We just hang out, have a beer, talk, play poker, and go to sleep. Nothing else happened.